Over time the domestic environment and familiar day to day routines can sap desire. Security, comfort, and a degree of predictability which we seek, can hinder feelings of excitement, adventure, and the erotic. How to have it all?
Sexual and emotional intimacy are so linked and yet sometimes improving emotional connection is not enough to improve physical intimacy and there will be a need to specifically look at enhancing sex.
Illness, stress, loss, or exhaustion through lack of sleep can affect physical intimacy and if this continues over a period of time it can have a negative impact on the relationship.
Pregnancy, birth, and the early days or sometimes years of parenting young children can affect physical intimacy for different reasons.
Issues around body image or not knowing what it is you or your partner desire, can also get in the way of a satisfying sex life.
Maybe one person is wanting to spice things up sexually and the other is not interested in exploring this.
For some couples the main challenge is with emotional intimacy. Unresolved issues and a breakdown in communication will of course affect emotional intimacy. If we’re not feeling heard, valued, or understood we won’t be feeling close to our partner. We might be longing for more empathy but not sure how to achieve this, or how to offer it.
Finding your way through intimacy challenges can be daunting. Couples therapy can help you with this if you are stuck and yet willing to look at what you are both bringing to the impasse.
I support you in a non-judgemental, confidential, and respectful way to explore personal issues. Together we enquire into what is getting in the way of you feeling intimately connected. There is often an emphasis on communication and finding more effective ways of expressing and receiving.
We’ll also be focusing on what you can change to help create more pleasure, connection, joy and vibrancy.